Last night was Anthony's birthday celebration. It was a good time. Our "crew" went to the Cheesecake Factory and as usually was rowdy and obnoxious and obviously the most fun in the entire restaurant. Mikey bought Anthony a McLovin' poster -- with C. Mintz-Plasse holding the Hawaii ID... I almost peed my pants when I saw it. We switched the Happy Birthday song around, and made the waiters sing to and ultimately embarass Dillon. I mean Taylor. Jew? Whoever the fuck. Haha. Afterward we went to Dave and Busters and played some arcade games. A bunch of us, actually all of us except the birthday boy; played the Trivia game. I won a round, and lost 2 to Mikey -- which I'm still sore about. Haha. Oh wells. By the end of the night I was bitching to go home, because the night before I had gotten absolutely no sleep and needed to go home to crawl into my bed and die.
I ended up not going to school, not strictly because of apathy, but because I knew last night that when my alarm went off at 6 o'clock today, it was going to take the jaws of life to pry me from my bed. So I didn't even bother setting my alarm clock. How's that for cutting out the middle-man? I slept until an ungodly 10 o'clock. It was glorious.
Today was free pancake day at iHop. (I don't know why I felt the need to do the Apple "iShit" thing for the International House Of Pancakes -- or Porn? or Perfection? Pancake Porn Perfection! AH-HAH! Got it.) Apparently, it's Fat Tuesday. Which somehow is a religious holiday or some shit? Anyway, for Fat Tuesday my family always eats pancakes for dinner. I don't know how this tradition got started up. (I've decided on starting my own religious holiday. It's called Pancake Day. It falls on Fat Tuesday every year and you eat pancakes and enjoy life.) Anyhoodles, apparently the rest of the free world is hip to our Pancake Day tradition (it'll catch on, I swear) and everyone and their mothers (and those mothers smelly poodles) felt the need to RUN to the nearest iHop and therefore steal all the parking spots away from us FAITHFUL Pancake Day celebrators. I was very offended. We decided to go to On The Border, instead. I got some tacos. They were pretty tasty, but there's still a pancake shaped hole in my tummy, waiting for the perfect short-stack to come and fill it. Pancake Day has been post-poned until further notice. (I'm thinking next Tuesday.)
Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday. This is my favorite bullshit occurance in the Catholic church. Everyone goes to church and recieves their ashes. Some old dude takes ashes from a Palm plant that was burned forever ago, and draws a cross on your forehead with them. Sweet! Where do I sign up?! It gets better though! After you get drawn on, you're supposed to promise to You Know Who that you're going to give something up for 40 days. Something you enjoy. Something that actually brings you joy in this pathetic shit-pit that we exist in. Most decide on Chocolate. We celebrate this. PEOPLE ACTUALLY CELEBRATE GIVING UP FUN STUFF.
I'm starting my own religion. Snarky-ism. It'll be a direct parody of all the religious bullshit I detest. We'll celebrate legit holidays like Kurt Cobain's birthday, Halloween, and most importantly of all: Pancake Day. Oh, and I'm adding another holiday to the list: Glitter Wednesday. Come to me on this particular Wednesday and tell me why you think you're awesome. And I'll put some Glitter on your forehead. But before you get your glitter, you've got to pick your absolute favorite thing to eat or do, and promise that you'll do it as often as possible in 40 days. (Yes, guys, masterbation does count!)
Snarky-ism is going to be the shit.
You'll think so too.
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Now playing: Hadouken! - Leap Of Faith
via FoxyTunes
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